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How to Train a Reactive Dog: Practical Steps for Calmer Walks & Real Progress

When you live with a reactive dog can it can feel like your whole life is walking on eggshells. Every walk is tense, every trigger is a gamble, and no matter how many tips you try and videos you watch, nothing seems to stick. If you’ve been searching for how to train a reactive dog, chances are you’ve already realised that the usual advice doesn’t quite cut it.

The thing is, reactivity isn’t just about obedience. It’s about management, regulation, trust, and building emotional safety and neutrality — for both of you. You’re not just teaching your dog to “sit” or “leave it.” You’re teaching them to cope with the world and their emotions.

In this post, I’ll walk you through what reactive dog training really involves, the crucial foundations that owners miss that you need in place before you start working on behaviour change, common mistakes to avoid, and the steps that will actually help your dog feel safer, calmer, and more in control.

Because when your dog feels more regulated — everything else becomes easier.

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The Reality of Reactive Dog Training

When most people hear “dog training,” they picture commands like sit, stay or heel — but that’s not the starting point for a reactive dog.

With reactivity, you’re not dealing with a dog that won’t listen — you’re dealing with a dog that can’t listen. Their nervous system is in overdrive. Their brain is locked into survival mode, flooded with stress, frustration, and adrenaline. Asking anything of them or trying to teach them in this state of mind would be like trying to do algebra while having a panic attack!

This is why traditional obedience training falls flat with reactive dogs. Trying to teach a “heel” or “leave it” when your dog is mid-meltdown isn’t just ineffective — it’s unfair. They don’t need more commands. They need nervous system support.

Real progress comes when you shift your mindset from stressing about “How do I control this?” to trying to understand “How do I help my dog feel safe enough to learn?”

Reactive dog training starts with regulation — plain and simple. Until you help your dog reset, rest, and decompress, no amount of drills or commands is going to stick.

This is why foundational pieces like decompression, emotional regulation, meeting their needs, and predictable routines matter so much. You’re building a baseline of calm to work from — not trying to teach skills on top of chaos (which is what a lot of us do).

This mean your training plan might look less like the traditional sit-stay-heel and more like this (and that's okay too):

Walks designed around sniffing, space, and decompression, not heeling downtown

Routines that prioritise sleep, predictability, and calm

Outlets that let off steam before you ask for engagement

Structure that helps your dog feel in control — not micromanaged

Daily enrichment and decompression activities
Less exposure to triggers and new environments

a small white dog pulling and barking on a leash

Why Regulation Comes First

Regulation is such an easily overlooked issue when it comes to fixing problem behaviour. What owners don't realise, though, is that if your dog is constantly stressed, overstimulated, or on edge, no training technique in the world will stick.

This is why so many of us stay in the same place for so long even though it feels like we are doing everything right — because we're fighting against our dogs, not working with them.

You can’t ask a dog to engage when their body is screaming “danger!” — and that’s the reality for a lot of reactive dogs. They’re not misbehaving out of spite. They’re overwhelmed. Whether it's fear, anxiety or excitement, until you help them come back down to baseline, everything else is just noise.

That’s why regulation comes first.

This is why, with any behaviour modification, the first thing I teach to my clients is teaching regulation. When a dog becomes more regulated you'll be amazed at what can actually change, how many problem behaviours lessen or even disappear.

If you're wondering what that actually looks like, think of it as meeting your dog’s core needs before you ask anything of them:

Sleep & Decompression – A reactive dog who’s overtired or overstimulated is a ticking time bomb. Deep, quality rest is non-negotiable.
Mental Enrichment - A tired mind is a calmer mind. Engaging your dog’s brain through sniffing, problem-solving, or low arousal activities helps take the edge off, provide stimulation, prevent boredom, and prevent that restless, frantic energy from building.

Outlets & Fulfilment – Dogs need a healthy way to express energy and emotion. Without it, you’re left with outbursts and behavioural meltdowns.

This is what I call the Holy Trinity of Behaviour — the foundation that allows reactive dogs to finally breathe, reset, and learn.

When your dog has this foundation and is regulated, rested, and fulfilled? You’re finally speaking the same language!

Before You Train, Help Your Dog Reset

If this feels like a lot, you’re not alone. I had no idea how much stress was impacting Jasper’s behaviour until I stripped everything back and focused on the essentials.

If your reactive dog is constantly wired, snappy, or impossible to settle — there’s a good chance they’re stuck in a cycle of stress and overstimulation. Before you jump into training, they might just need a reset.

That’s exactly why I created my Stress Detox Protocol — a simple but powerful reset designed to help reactive dogs (and their owners) regulate, recharge, and reconnect before jumping into training.

Because sometimes, the best first step isn’t more training — it’s less chaos.

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Click To Finally Reset Your Dog

The Core Pillars of Reactive Dog Training

Training a reactive dog isn’t about getting perfect obedience, it's so much more, it’s about building emotional stability, neutrality, trust, impulse control, regulation and a framework your dog can rely on when things get overwhelming.

These five pillars form the backbone of reactive dog training:

#1 - Engagement

Before you can ask your dog to listen in the presence of triggers, you need to become more valuable than the environment. You need to build that connection with your dog where work feels like play.

Engagement means building a relationship where your dog actually wants to check in with you, wants to work with you — not just because of food, but because you’ve become a safe, fun and predictable anchor.

Teach your dog that you’re worth tuning into through games, calm and clear communication, and daily connection.

Engagement starts at home and builds into real world situations.

#2 - Neutrality

The goal isn’t to make your dog love everything and everyone, that's impossible and pretty unreasonable — it’s to help them feel unbothered about them. That’s neutrality.

Many owners think socialisation means making their reactive dog “friendly,” and going on play dates, but what most dogs actually need is exposure that helps them feel safe, calm, in control and emotionally neutral around other dogs, people, or stimuli.

Neutrality is built through distance, structure, and repeated safe and positive experiences — not throwing them into situations they aren’t ready for.

#3 - Impulse Control

Reactive dogs often struggle with over-arousal and emotional outbursts from daily stress and frustration. Teaching impulse control gives them the ability to pause, think, and choose a calmer behaviour — rather than exploding the moment something exciting or stressful happens.

Start small: pausing before doors open, offering eye contact before releasing them to sniff, or waiting calmly for food. These little impulse control exercises help your dog build the ability to make better decisions when under pressure, which becomes incredibly valuable in reactive moments.

a brown and white dog lying on the floor

#4 - Boundaries & Structure

Structure creates predictability, and predictability helps your dog feel safe. Boundaries create expectations, and expectations create clarity and reduce anxiety.

Structured walks, consistent rules, place training, calm routines, and safe setups reduce the mental chaos your dog has to navigate. When your dog knows what to expect and what's allowed, they’re less likely to overreact and more likely to think about their actions.

Boundaries aren’t about being strict — they’re about creating a clear framework that your dog can thrive within. Boundaries lead to freedom and liberty.

#5 - Counterconditioning & Desensitisation

This is where we change the emotion behind the reactivity.

Counterconditioning is the process of pairing your dog’s trigger with something they love — like food or play — to create a new positive (and hopefully calmer) emotional response. Desensitisation means exposing your dog to triggers gradually, starting at a distance they feel safe, and slowly reducing that distance over time showing them an alternative to their usual psychotic behaviour.

These techniques work hand-in-hand, and when used correctly, they help your dog feel better, not just act better. Without calm and controlled emotional change, behavioural change rarely sticks.

The Importance of Management (Before You Train Anything)

Before you can train a reactive dog, you have to manage them.

Management isn’t a shortcut — it’s the safety net that allows training to work in the first place. Without it, your dog ends up rehearsing the very behaviours you’re trying to change.

Think of it like baby-proofing a house. You don’t wait for a toddler to learn safety — you put in gates, covers, and rules to keep them secure while they learn, and when they're tired? We give them space to take a nap. Your reactive dog needs the same.

Here’s what strong management might look like:

Using a muzzle to reduce risk and give you confidence

Choosing quiet walking routes that prevent trigger overload

Crossing the street when a trigger appears instead of “pushing through”

Walking at low-traffic times or even skipping walks on hard days

Preventing window reactivity with frosted film or blocked access
Using gentle music to block out residential sounds
Providing safe havens and encouraging quality sleep on a daily basis

When you remove the constant stress of unpredictable triggers and daily furstration and overstimulation, your dog finally has space to breathe — and that’s when real learning begins.

Management isn't the end goal. But it's the bridge between chaos and calm

Track the Wins You Can’t Always See

Progress with a reactive dog is rarely linear — and sometimes, it’s hard to spot unless you’re keeping track.

That’s exactly why I created the Notion Dog Training Journal. It’s a digital space to track triggers, reactions, daily routines, and the small wins that matter most — like shorter recovery times, calmer mornings, or even one less bark on a walk.

When you’re in the thick of it, it’s easy to miss how far you’ve come. This journal helps you stay grounded, see patterns clearly, and stay motivated — even on the hard days.

If you’re training a reactive dog, tracking progress isn’t optional — it’s empowering.

digital dog training journal for progress tracking image

Start Tracking Progress Today

What Progress Actually Looks Like

When people ask “how do I train a reactive dog?” — they’re usually picturing perfect loose leash walks, calm behaviour around every dog, and full attention at all times.

But that’s not what real progress looks like, that's not even what reality looks like.

Reactive dog training isn’t about achieving perfection — it’s about understanding, helping your dog recover faster, regulate better, and feel safer in their world.

The real wins are subtle at first:

Your dog chooses to disengage, check in or sniff instead of scan.

They look to you instead of accting on impulse or lunging forward.

They recover in seconds after seeing a trigger, not minutes.

They sleep more deeply after a walk instead of pacing for hours.

One of my biggest moments with Jasper wasn’t when he walked past a dog silently — it was when he spotted one at a distance, took a breath, then turned to me without needing a command. That moment didn’t come from obedience — it came from emotional resilience we’d built over time.

Progress often looks like:

Shorter walks that end in calm instead of overexposure and chaos.
A day where nothing exciting happened and that’s a win.
A trigger appearing and your dog choosing to stay under threshold.

Focusing more on meeting needs and decompression than the chaotic norm.

You’re not just training behaviours — that's just part of the puzzle — you’re rewiring patterns of stress and reactivity. That takes time, patience, compassion, and consistency.

Look for the small wins. They’re the sign your dog is learning to rest, regulate, and recover. That’s where lasting change begins.

a brown and white dog stsnding on top of a grass covered field

Training Skills That Build Confidence and Control

You don’t need fancy drills to train a reactive dog, trust me, I spent ages thinking obedience was the answer. What you really need is calm, purposeful reps that build clarity and confidence.

These foundational exercises help set expectations, shift their focus, and manage their emotions.

Here are a few I recommend starting with:

Engage/Disengage

This game helps your dog learn they don’t have to react — they can choose to check in with you instead. It’s one of the first things I teach with any reactive dog. Spot a trigger, mark when your dog notices it and up the stakes to a point where they choose to look away. It's simple, effective, and builds emotional regulation in real time.

Place Work & Boundary Training

Teaching your dog to stay on a mat or place platform builds impulse control and gives them a safe zone for regulation and decompression. It’s not about having a rigid “stay” — it’s about helping them learn to relax while the world continues around them. Start indoors, then slowly bring it into more distracting environments. (Want more on this? You’ll love the post on place training for reactive dogs.)

Free Shaping (Frustration Tolerance)

Letting your dog figure things out without guidance builds incredible mental stamina and frustration tolerance. It’s also a great way to boost their confidence and ability to think clearer under pressure. Start small — like shaping a nose touch or step onto a platform — and reward persistence, not perfection.

Impulse Control Work

Games like “It’s Yer Choice” are brilliant for teaching dogs that pausing = rewards. It rewires that impulsive urge to grab, bark, or lunge. If you haven’t already, read my full post on impulse control dog training.

Obedience for Relationship Building

While I have blabbered on that obedience isn’t the goal, it is still a valuable tool. Teaching cues like “leave it,” “with me,” or “middle” can give your dog guidance in tough moments. It builds your working relationship, helps your dog stay engaged, and offers both of you some stability and confidence in chaotic situations you've practised before.

Practice Real-Life Skills Gradually

You don’t need to train daily or conquer every trigger today. In fact, the best progress comes from slowly building real-world confidence and boundaries — one layer at a time.

Start with everyday moments:

Loose leash walking in low distraction and low exposure areas.

Calm greetings with familiar people.

Engagement work while other dogs are nearby but not too close.

Dealing with setbacks and learning when to take a break.
Calm and predictable desensitisation in the distance of triggers.

Everything you teach should start in a quiet space and eventually practised with intention out in the real world — but never before your dog is ready.

Don’t rush the process, so many owners claim that their dog understands "sit" indoors but outside he's a menace, those dogs weren't ready for that jump. Reactive dogs need time to layer in new skills before the environment turns up the pressure.

If you're feeling stuck or unsure how to adapt these skills to your daily life, this is exactly what I help people with in my 1:1 virtual coaching sessions. Whether you’re working on walks, greetings, reactivity, or just building trust again — we can build a plan that fits you, your dog, and your lifestyle.

And if you want a simple way to track your progress, spot patterns, and keep everything in one place — don’t forget about the Digital Training Journal. It was designed for dogs just like yours.

digital dog training journal and progress tracker

Common Mistakes to Avoid When Training a Reactive Dog

Even with the best intentions, it’s easy to make choices that slow progress — or worse, send you backwards. A lot of us stay in a weird management purgatory-like phase where it just feels like we're reapeting silly mistakes.

Here are some of the most common mistakes I see reactive dog owners make (I’ve made ~~some~~ all of these myself, too):

Skipping Regulation

If your dog is constantly on edge, they’re not in a state to learn. You can have the best training plan in place but no amount of training will stick if your dog is overtired, overstimulated, or running on stress. Before you ask for obedience, prioritise decompression, sleep, and emotional reset (if you haven't already check out my Detox Protocol for a plan you can follow).

Overexposing Too Soon

Just because your dog stayed calm once doesn’t mean they’re ready for full exposure. Progress requires patience. Working in hospitality, I saw a lot of dogs being put in places they weren't ready for. Rushing ahead like that can break the confidence you’ve worked so hard to build — and reinforce the very behaviours you’re trying to change.

Expecting Obedience Before Needs

Reactive dogs aren’t ignoring you to be difficult — their nervous system is running in overdrive, they're too overwhelmed to follow any guidance. Focus on management, meeting needs, creating predictability, developing expectations and helping them feel in control before worrying about perfect heelwork.

Not Tracking Patterns

Progress often hides in the details and isn't really visible until we start looking at the bigger picture. Without tracking routines, triggers, and wins, it’s hard to see what’s working (or what’s not). Journaling helps you notice patterns, celebrate the small wins, and make smarter adjustments.

Training in Isolation

Trying to figure this all out alone is overwhelming. Sometimes all it takes is a second set of eyes, a fresh perspective, or just people who gt what you're going through. If you’re stuck or spiralling, reaching out for support or finding a community can change everything!

Need a Place to Start? Grab the Reactivity Starter Bundle

Feeling overwhelmed by all the pieces? Reactivity is a complex puzzle, and no two dogs are exactly the same.

The Reactivity Starter Bundle brings together your first few steps in one simple place.

A stress detox to reset the nervous system

Understand the why behind your dog’s reactions — and what to do about them
Learn to observe first, train second — so you’re not always reacting to the chaos

Go at your dog’s pace, with tools that respect where they’re starting from

Designed specifically for anxious, reactive, and overstimulated dog
And guidance to help you build a calmer, more connected foundation

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Whether you’re brand new to this or restarting after a setback (or several), this bundle is the place to begin.

Final Thoughts

Living with a reactive dog isn’t about fixing every behaviour overnight — it’s about building a relationship rooted in trust, regulation, and understanding, no matter how long that takes.

When you shift your focus from “obedience first” to emotional support and progress over perfection, everything begins to change.

There will still be hard days. You will encounter setbacks. Your dog might regress. You might feel stuck. But those small wins — the pause before a reaction, the moment they look to you for guidance, the ability to decompress after a walk — that’s the real progress that will keep you going when it gets tough, the life you could have with your dog.

You don’t need to get it perfect. You just need to keep going — with consistency, compassion, and a plan that works for your dog. And if no one’s told you lately, you’re doing a damn good job.

Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs): Training A Dog The Right Way

What should you not do with a reactive dog?

Avoid correcting your dog for reacting — at that point, you've missed your mark, and it might suppress the behaviour temporarily, but it doesn’t change how they feel. Make sure you are working on everything before the reaction.

Also, avoid flooding them with triggers (“they’ll get used to it”) or expecting obedience when they’re already overwhelmed. Always focus on building emotional safety and predictability first.

Is it my fault my dog is reactive?

No. Reactivity isn’t a reflection of failure — it’s a reflection of stress, genetics, environment, and unmet needs. Could we have contributed to the issue? Maybe. But what is in your control is how you choose to support and guide your dog moving forward.

Does dog reactivity ever go away?

For some dogs, yes — especially with consistent training, lifestyle adjustments, and support. For others, it may never disappear entirely, but it can be managed so well that life becomes a lot more peaceful and enjoyable. Some people can have a reactive-neutral-calm dog that they can still take everywhere.

How do you desensitise a reactive dog?

You start by controlling their environment, teaching regulation, reducing their stress load, and working below threshold where they can learn. Focus on building engagement (not obsession), structure, and gradual exposure using counter-conditioning. The right knowledge, distance, and timing are key — and consistent practice matters more than any single session.

How do I stop my dog from being reactive on walks?

Desensitisation means gradually exposing your dog to a trigger at a low enough intensity and distance that they notice it, but don’t react to it — and pairing that with something positive like food, gentle praise or play. This takes patience and planning, but it’s one of the most effective ways to change how your dog feels towards something, not just how they behave.