Neutralise before you socialise (trust me)

Hey {first_name},

How's your week been?

Don’t worry, you don’t need to dress it up. Mine’s still sitting firmly in the “chaotic mess” category.

Jasper’s declining a little more — nothing sudden, just slow and steady, which somehow feels worse. The cottage I had my eye on? Gone. Someone else swooped in and grabbed it, so I’m back to hunting. Still trying to manifest a quiet patch of earth somewhere with decent heating and zero unexpected noises.

It’s all feeling very unsettled. But I’m holding onto the idea that after disaster comes opportunity.

Let’s kick off something I’m calling the Neutrality Series — aka: why your dog doesn’t need to be everyone’s best friend, why exposure isn’t the answer to everything, and how to start creating a foundation of neutrality.

Here’s a phrase I keep coming back to:

Neutralise, then socialise.

Because most of the time, when people are struggling, it’s not because they didn’t socialise their dog. It’s because they tried to do too much before their dog was ready.

• Your dog doesn’t need to go to more cafés.

• They don’t need more dogs in their face.

• They need to be able to exist around stuff without spiralling.

That’s neutrality.

I know some of you might be thinking "well that's a bit boring", "I want my dog to be friends with other dogs", "Shut up Junior".

I get it. The majority of owners want a dog they can take everywhere and do everything...but the majoriy of owners hop, skip and jump over the main foundations and go straight for gold...whilst admirable — without the right foundations and regulation, this can be a cluster-fuck of chaos and could end up being an even harder problem to fix down the line.

You’ve got to:

• Reset the nervous system

• Build emotional tolerance

• Teach them how to regulate and think clearly

• Then (if needed) expand their world again

And that’s what this series will dive into — how neutrality works, why it matters, and how to build it without losing your mind.

More next week.

New Blog Post

• Nothing new, but Sunday I'm dropping a banger!

Updated Blog Posts

• Training Your Dog to Ignore Other Dogs: Why It Matters

• Why Your Dog Is a Nightmare to Walk (+ What to Do)

Virtual Coaching Availability

This weekend is the last weekend to book any virtual sessions with me using your codes.

If interest, just drop me an email instead of going through the form. I have a full weekend free!!

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That’s it from me.

I’ll be spending the weekend rewatching Season 3 of The Bear so I can run through Season 4 like a train!

Hope you get a pocket of peace at some point this weekend (or at least a good TV binge).

Take care {first_name}!